Thursday, 23 July 2015

Family time, without the extras

Hi All,

I can't say it enough how amazing our God is.
By totally surrendering myself t Him I an enjoy His help in my life. Our flesh is not strong enough to fight the ways of the world.

Why I'm saying this, is because of what happened this morning and last night. As I was lying on the couch with my son next to me. Who was busy falling asleep. My husband was lying on the other couch and my mom and the other one. It was load shedding, and I must say the one benefit of it is the silence. I was busy playing some soft music on my phone and while I look up I see my my husband and my mom in law both on their phones. 

Now you might think, hey, there's nothing wrong with that. I mean it's load shedding, nothing else to do right? Well I also thought so as we did play with our son earlier on caught up on our day at work and so on. But. The devil doesn't destroy a family over night. 
So this didn't bug me, well untill this morning.

This morning I have received an email from a friend of mine. She asked me if she can contribute something towards my blog. So I said sure, I love other peoples stories and input. I wasn't expecting what she was going to write. She also said that this is not something she usually do but she felt like she had to share this with me. Thank you Alice for this message. And I hope it will also touch other families.

Here is what she has wrote to me:

I always had this thing in my mind... and at one stage we did implement it at home.... 
but then again... last couple of months we didn't .... 

I started doing this thing at night what I call
"NO phones at Home" 

When we get home... myself and Denzil puts away our phones.... 
this helps with spending time with Ronaldo, also communicating with each other. 
I saw now again in the past couple of months, where we slacked again, and DID NOT do it, 
how we live "past" each other at night. 

We sit on our phones / messaging... facebook... emails.... etc... 
and we do not talk to each other. 
Also I can see the effect it has on Ronaldo. When we are on our phone constantly, Ronaldo would 
always ask to look at photos or videos on my phone / or Denzil's phone.... 
not necessarily because he wants to look at that, but to get our attention and "take the phone away from us" 
if you understand what I mean. 

So in the past, I said to Denzil  "no phone at home" until Ronaldo goes to bed, then the phones are allowed to 
come out. 

I think this is a great idea for any household, and might help people to communicate better, and spend time 
together as a family, talking, and not being on your own "busy" with your cellphone. 

So you probably have put the two together, didn't you?
Now tell me my friend if God isn't real and amazing, than I don't know. He has used my friend to warn me on the effect of phones, Tv's and tablets on a family. God doesn't want to see me family suffer, so he used someone else to warn me in advance. 
Now that my friend that is God that cares.

And what would have happened if I ignored this warning?

Me and my family would carry on using technology during family time. Unaware of the damage it's doing on our family until it's to late. son will be grown up, and what do I actually know about him, his character and the type of person he is. husband will be someone I just live with. There will be no connection, just two people paying the bills and caring for their child. 
Eventually....I would be thinking what happened? How God allowed this to happen?
In the meantime, he warned me, but I didn't listen.

Dear friends, my wish and prayer is that none of you will ever have to wake up one day and realize all the damage that has been done. My friend, don't allow cracks to form in your family. It is devils opportunity to make the crack bigger and than eventually destroying the family.

I'm not saying we must leave out all the technology out of our lives, after all I'm using it to share this message with you all. What I'm saying is to minimize the use of technology and allow family time where you learn about your kids and your husband or wife. Quality family time with no distractions.

Here are some ideas and suggestions:
* Take an hour, two or even until kids are in bed. And devote that time to family time. Put all cellphones and tablets away. Play, talk and learn about each other. Create a bond nothing and no one will break.

* When using technology with and around your kids, put it to good use. Read a bible verse out of it, play an educational game or play gospel music. 

* Make a family pledge of no use of cellphones and tablets during family time. Let every member of the family sign it and hang it up on the wall. So that it will be a reminder to all about the promise they have made. 

* Make it exciting for your kids and yourself to leave out the cellphones/tablets. Play some fun games. Play games where you have to guess things about each other. Go for a walk. 
Ideas are endless. 

Also, don't forget to explain to your kids why you have created this no cellphone/tablet time. Let them understand and be part of this family decision. Use this time to learn about your child and your child learning about you. Build your child's character and listen to him/her without any distractions. Allow them to feel as if this is their safe place, where they can be themselves and express themselves how they want to.

Dear Lord, 
I pray that more and more families will implement this idea. And spend family time together and bond to be a strong family. It's not always an easy process. Especially in the world we live in. I pray that those families that are in trouble, that You will give them strentgh Lord, that You will help and guide them closer to You.
In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen.

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